A New Adviser's Journal

May 2005

Meaningful Connections with Students

If an adviser only has one opportunity to meet with a student, connecting with him or her on a level that constitutes a positive and lasting relationship is difficult if not impossible. However, if advising units create conditions in which periodic advising is mandatory, relationship building becomes much easier as trust continuously increases between each adviser and his or her respective advisees. A delicate balance must be struck during the college years as we seek to help create educated, responsible, and productive citizens by means of providing the appropriate mixture of freedom and guidance/supervision. To me, it seems like an excuse when colleges and universities place nearly all responsibility in students' hands, claiming that it aids in producing competent and independent adults. I appreciate Light's (2001) statement regarding getting in students' way:

At the beginning of this book, I quoted a dean from another university who said the strategy at his college was to admit a talented group of students and then just “get out of their way.” It seems clear to me from the dozens of anecdotes and examples in this book that campus leaders should indeed implement the first part of that plan—admit a talented group of students—and then do exactly the opposite of that dean's recommendation. They should make a thoughtful, evidence-based, purposeful effort to get in each student's way. In fact, shaping a certain kind of campus culture may be the biggest contribution campus leaders can make. (p. 209)

Although this sentiment makes sense in written form to me, the reality of it didn't really reveal itself until about eleven months into my advising position. I started to have conversations with students that went well beyond academic and first-year experience small talk. I started to have students coming in just to tell me about things like their study abroad placements, good grades on research papers, and going through the resident assistant (RA) process. It was exciting to realize that students were coming in voluntarily just to chat and hang out. Academic planning is important, of course, but it's nice to move beyond scheduling and on to students' personal and academic goals and aspirations.

When I first began advising, I thought that simply talking to students about their college experiences would help improve our relationship. It did, but not as much as I hoped. As the year went on, I found myself being more forward with some students in terms of what we talked about. I began to display more interest by not just asking about academic topics but by instead asking students to show me things. In light of this, one method of relationship building has proven to be helpful with several of my students. Rather than just asking them how they have done on a big project or research paper, I ask them to bring in the paper or project so I can see it. Some students look at me like I am weird and never bring me anything. However, several students have brought back assignments they had done particularly well. Who doesn't want to show off something that they are proud of? The primary benefits are twofold: (1) students realize just a bit more that someone on campus cares about what they're doing, and (2) I get information regarding the curricula of various classes. The secondary benefit, although just as important as the primary benefits, is the growth of the adviser-advisee relationship.

Along with asking students to show me evidence of what they've been up to, I also ask that they send me postcards if they study abroad or do volunteer work in other parts of the country or world. I give these students a business card and ask that, on the back of the card, they write something along the lines of “Don't throw away! Send Patrick a postcard while studying abroad!” Although I've only gotten two postcards back, they have instantly become conversation starters for students interested in traveling. It appears that having postcards pinned up helps in making study abroad and other travel experiences become more of a reality. When an advisee is able to see that other students have followed through with their plans to travel, it increases the perceived possibility of it all. I have witnessed much increased motivation in advisees as I point out the postcards my students sent me while abroad in Spain and Costa Rica. I will definitely continue to ask for postcards in the future, and I will also continue to ask study-abroad veterans to serve as references for prospective students.

The student newspaper is another way to show interest in students' academics. If I can find some free time, I skim through the paper to see if any of my advisees were written about or if they authored an article or letter to the editor. During this last month, one of my advisees was promoted to editor of the sports section. Another first-year advisee did an article on a board of trustees meeting. Although the piece was rather brief, she was extremely excited as it was her first article published in the EWU student newspaper. When both of these advisees came in for individual appointments, I was able to congratulate them. I got similar responses from the two students: “You actually read that stuff?!” They said it jokingly, but both stated it was nice to know their work is being read. And both appointments went extremely well from that point on as each student spoke fondly of why they enjoy writing and journalism.

These ideas are such simple ways to connect a tiny bit more with students, and I anticipate I will discover more relationship-building techniques with increased experience. One thing to note is that, by going the extra mile or making an extra effort, I don't feel any increase in workload. In fact, it's just the opposite. My days seem to flow smoothly if it includes advisees with whom I've developed relationships. It's as though, once we get below that superficial and sometimes awkward surface, information flows freely between us, creating an environment where students are more receptive to my information. After the advisees listen to what I have to say, they tend to give more information as well. So that little bit of interest I show my advisees is recouped shortly thereafter as they grant me permission to go a little further into the mindset of what it's like being a student at EWU.